Race in this place

I started writing this entry on our last day in Moscow, and I thought it was worth finishing so here it is:

During orientation I received a rather chilling message about Russian racism. I'm sure Marc and Anna didn't mean to scare me...they spoke directly and paused often in search of the best possible way to phrase such a delicate topic and I appreciate the sensitivity. Regardless, I escaped to the restroom following the discussion and yes, I cried. Could it be possible that this country which I'd fallen in love with would reject me just because of the skin that I'm in?

A few days before departure I started to get anxious again and decided to Google search Russian racism so I could prepare myself. There were some lovely articles about violent racist conflicts with skinheads and other extremists (something we touched on during orientation). I also learned that some Russians are hostile towards anyone who looks non-Russian and refer to these people as чёрный (black) even if they may be Caucasian (so if I was hated I would be in good company I guess.) Marc explained during "The Blue Monster" that чёрный was an incredibly derogatory term and that the politically correct way to say African American/Black here is actually негер which sounds like "nyeger" or "nigger." Huh.

Despite my initial misgivings however, the majority of my interactions with the Russian people have been quite positive. I find that people's reactions to me seem to fall into three categories: indifference, curiosity, and open fascination. Indifference is great. I mean, everyone treats strangers with indifference so this is hardly worthy of note. Curiosity is a little more ambiguous. Staring is OK in Russia as several people have already mentioned, and a scowl or a frown in idle mode is the norm here. So is that woman at the metro scowling at me because I'm black or is that just her natural expression? Do people look at me longer than my fellow comrades or could I be imagining it? Was that little boy at the theater who literally walked up to me, stopped, grimaced, and then passed by racist or was he just an insolent child? What about those adolescent boys on the Metro who were pointing me out to their friends and laughing? Was it just a "hey look! some black chick! don't see very many of those..." or a "dude, check out that wierd nigger over there..."? Foreigners here are targets for thieves in general, but is there a difference between how a predator would view a black foreigner as opposed to a white one? In what way?

I could go on and on but at the end of the day, what's the point? I can't read these people's minds and I can't see into their hearts. I haven't been attacked and I haven't heard people calling me чёрная or any other derogatory term. The most I can say is that I am for sure viewed as a foreigner and that my skin is a dead give-away. I have not ventured out on my own because I'm a woman and black one at that--a very obvious target. I can't blend in and I don't feel safe (though to be fair I admit that I'm a country-mouse--don't feel safe in Chicago either).

I want to move on now and talk about open fascination because this is where a lot of my positive experiences come in. Back at Godzillas, our wonderful hostel in Moscow, I would notice this Russian woman staring at me in the 3rd floor kitchen. She wouldn't smile until I returned her gaze and then she would look away. I was a little annoyed to tell the truth. One day I came in to make a salad and she was in there with her son speaking Russian. After 10 minutes of ignoring each other, she asked me about myself in English and when she found out I knew a little Russian her eyes lit up and we began a 2 hour long conversation in both languages. What fun! Her name is Tatiana and she was in Moscow with her fiance, an American named Donald who was also staying at the hostel and got to know some of our students quite well. She told me about herself and her family, tought me some Russian phrases, was patient with me as I stumbled over my words (though at times I was so comfortable I was able to speak fluently), and was just fascinated by everything I said. She was from the far eastern part of Russia near China and Donald later told me that I was the first black person she'd ever seen. She was quite taken, and even invited Hannah and me to the circus that weekend. Such a sweet lady. :)

Then there was Oksana, an actress and musician we met during our first week in Moscow. After her wonderful performance at the bar, she came to the non-smoking section to meet and take a picture with the class. She's seriously cool and I was actually a little intimidated but she smiled at everyone and was so interested in us. She called me "[her] beauty" and insisted on holding my hand when we took the class picture and embraced me afterwards. At her theater performance (she starred in K.I. from Crime), she would choose members of the audience to interact with at different times and she chose me at one point and handed me an invitation as part of her act. After her performance she hugged me again and called me her beauty. Wow. I did nothing to deserve such star treatment but sometimes it pays to be different. Other things like this have happened and they definently help to balance out any negative experiences I might have because of my race.

People react to me in various ways, and I also react Russia in a racially-sensitve manner. It's a little lonely sometimes living in such a mono-racial society. Russia is diverse in its own way--there are Georgians, Cossacks, Gypsies, and other groups but sometimes I wonder, where are all the Asians, the Hispanics, the Africans? I'm a minority back home and I'm used to it, but here it feels like seeing another black person is a rare sighting, like venturing into the jungle and catching sight of a white tiger. There was one other black person staying at Godzillas in Moscow who arrived during our last week. We had a conversation over breakfast and when I had to leave for Novgorod the next day, I felt like I was saying goodbye to my brother even though I barely knew him.


Well, those are my thoughts on race in this place. Sometimes race means nothing, other times I'm not sure what it means, and every once in a while it actually opens doors. I can't make any generalizations from my experiences, but I hope this was somewhat informative and helpful to anyone interested in how race might impact a foreigner's travels in Russia. Ciao for now.